Tuesday, 9 June 2009

I'm thinking of writing a story about a man who every time he turns on the television sees Steven Fry: Steven Fry hosting quiz shows, Steven Fry visiting far off places via tricycle, Steven Fry in comfortably English but rather dull situation comedies in the tradition of Dad's Army, Steven Fry making over celebrity hamsters on crack, Steven Fry the enthusiastic political analyst on crack, Steven Fry training for space, Steven Fry playing the mandolin for Metallica. Steven Fry's Grand Designs.
He sees nothing but the man until gradually and inevitably Steven Fry becomes the sole representative of mankind on earth, and everybody knows that Steven Fry is sometimes very depressed, and so therefore all earthlings are sometimes very depressed. Earthlings are sometimes very depressed because they can't help it because of how awful they are. Life would be considerably more bearable as a fucking squirrel they mutter to each other while pondering the bargain packs of Steven Fry Sausage Sensations for £1 in Iceland.
Unfortunately Steven Fry has no place left to run off to when he gets suddenly very depressed, so they have to make programs about that too, and creatures from other planets look on aghast at how awful earthlings are, since had long ago learned to behave otherwise. Then they decide to make Steven Fry the villain in their astoundingly successful intergallactic multi media entertainments based on dedicated studies of Star Trek and Galaxy Quest and then they laugh for centuries.
What happens if Britain goes bust?

1 comment:

  1. I wouldn't be worry if Britain goes bust or not. China, Russia or USA (maybe) will buy it. Like EU bought Iceland, its no problemo. Iam sure they would get special deal, like buy one get one free- UK and Scotland package - for example.

    There are more important things to worry ;) like what to do with 200GBP worth 3D print model from Bartlett??